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My Turn
by

Wayne Chan

From The Asian Reporter, V33, #4 (April 3, 2023), page 6.

Everything Everywhere All at Once and into the future

The evening of this year’s Oscars was a big night for Asians everywhere. One could say that it was a big night for Everything Everywhere All at Once.

Not only did the film win the night’s biggest honor, but Ke Huy Quan took home the Oscar for best supporting actor and Michelle Yeoh won for best actress, both for the same film.

All sorts of barriers were broken. What the film Crazy Rich Asians did to break down stereotypes about Asians several years ago, Everything Everywhere All at Once seemed to ignore that there were ever any stereotypes to begin with.

Asian-American culture now has its moment, and it seems to me that we all need to contribute to keep up the momentum. In my own small way, I’d like to do my part.

Therefore, as a writer, I would like to make some suggestions to any future screenwriters out there who would like to write the next Oscar-worthy Asian-themed screenplay.

Here are my suggestions:

1. Although Everything Everywhere All at Once has some martial arts scenes, its main focus is not about martial arts. So, from now on, a little martial arts is fine if you really must, but try to keep it to a minimum. A particular pet peeve — if your hero must get into a fight, try to avoid the bit where they happen to find a seemingly ordinary prop sitting around — like a broom or a fanny pack — and miraculously turn it into the world’s most deadly weapon.

2. No more stories in which the protagonist is on some kind of life-threatening mission to defend their parent’s honor. We get it — they love their parents. That doesn’t mean they always have to risk their life to prove it. Maybe have them take their parents out for dinner instead.

3. If there are any scenes where the hero is sharing their concerns with their grandparents, they can be wise and earnest, but avoid at all costs having every other sentence they utter seem like they just memorized an entire edition of Confucianism for Dummies.

4. The hero’s family may not run a family-owned restaurant. Sorry, there’s no negotiating this one.

5. If the screenplay is about a superhero who happens to be Asian (please reread #1 as a reminder), their alter ego, meaning, their regular life when they are not doing superhero things, may not be an engineer, genetic scientist, or an accountant. Acceptable alter egos are: construction worker, airline pilot, beauty pageant host, or lion tamer.

Having said all that, I’m currently researching the real life story of my father, who went on a trek to defend his father’s honor. Among the many occupations he had during his lifetime was electrical engineer, and he owned a Chinese restaurant, as well as a laundry.

I guess I just need to chalk this up to one of those "do as I say, not as I do" things.

Humor writer Wayne Chan lives in the San Diego area;

cartoonist Wayne Chan is based in the Bay Area.

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Opinions expressed in this newspaper are those of the
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My Turn by

Wayne Chan

My Turn
by