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From The Asian Reporter, V33, #7 (July 3, 2023), page
6.
The gift with the greatest reward
When was the last time you experienced something joyful?
I’m not talking about your average, run-of-the-mill pleasantness, like discovering the local grocery store just started stocking your favorite yogurt, or that moment of anticipation when the doorbell rings and you realize your latest online order has finally arrived.
Those are both nice moments, but no, I’m talking about the sheer delight of an experience that is brand new, something you’ve never experienced before.
Actually, the moment I’m thinking about is the joy I felt when that newfound experience happened to someone else. Hmm … maybe it would be better for me to take a moment to explain.
Recently, someone came into our lives who was born in China originally and arrived in the U.S. as a baby. By all accounts, she was raised in a healthy, happy home and has become a lovely, mature, and conscientious young woman.
In getting to know her, our family has found that she lives her life and finds joy in the simplest things — the splendor of a bird in flight, the beauty of Mother Nature, the gentle waves of the ocean while stepping on a sandy beach. When I say simple, it’s not to say that it’s basic or no big deal. Sometimes it’s the purity of an experience that takes your breath away.
In one of our conversations, she casually mentioned that even though she was born in China and was learning Chinese in school, she’d never had an opportunity to try Peking Duck. Living in a small town in the Midwest, she had just never come across it.
I think it would be a safe bet to say that everyone I personally know has tried Peking Duck at least once in their lives, but for those out there who haven’t, Peking Duck is slow-roasted duck that has been prepared in such as way that the skin is incredibly crispy and carved into thin slices that can be placed in a white steam bun along with strands of green onions and a savory plum sauce. It’s one of my favorite Chinese dishes.
As you can imagine, when I heard our friend had never tried this delectable dish before, it became a priority of mine to rectify the situation. So, not too long after hearing this, we went to one of our favorite Chinese restaurants — one that has perfected this particular dish.
When the duck arrived, we carefully assembled each bun with a slice of duck, the green onion, and the plum sauce. She took her first bite, looked up, and said, "This is really good!"
No, she didn’t jump up and down in sheer delight. She didn’t plow into the duck as if she had been deprived her entire life. She took a few more bites and we all had a terrific rest of our meal.
She didn’t react as if she had just won the lottery, but that’s not the point. It had very little to do with the duck, either. After all, I’ve had Peking Duck a hundred times and I like it, but having it a hundred and first time is not really going to be an amazing experience or even get me to write a column about it.
What I immediately discovered is the joy that comes from making the effort to give someone else a moment of joy. In this case, it was the joy a friend experienced by going to a Chinese restaurant and trying something new. But the joy I’m really referring to is the one that I felt in making that experience happen for someone other than myself.
It immediately took me back to other experiences I’ve witnessed — the joy on my son’s face the first time he rode a bike, the joy of delivering a Christmas tree to a family having a tough time at the end of a rough year, or just making a few simple meals for a friend experiencing some difficulties.
The joy that is felt when you’ve done something nice for someone else just towers over the momentary gratification of buying a new car or going on an expensive vacation.
It’s a joy that really puts things into perspective.
Humor writer Wayne Chan lives in the San Diego area; cartoonist Wayne Chan is based in the Bay Area.
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